Can't get a job?

Yes. That sucks. I can't either. But now, via Mike-D, we can see how the pros do it.

"Let me introduce myself... My full name is Svetlana A. Goncharova, of course, it sounds rather pompous for a girl of my age, so my friends call me Sveta. I was born on the 22-nd of February, 1980 in Kiev, Ukraine..."

Let Sveta teach you. Let Sveta teach us all.